Dear Father to my Children,

Dear Father to my Children Sperm Donor,

How do you measure your parental skills? How do you know when you are doing well versus when you SUCK? Do you care? How many “trophies” do you need? When will enough be enough? I wish you would stop causing heart ache and destruction in the lives of your children. I wish that you would do me a favor and MOVE.

For the past 21 years I can count on one hand how many times you have done the right thing for your children. The right thing is defined as when you did something that only benefited your children and did nothing for you including making you look good to others. Sweetie that is a total of 5 or LESS times.

  1. Secured Santa to come to the house to visit your son and oldest daughter.
  2. Gave your oldest daughter a bath every night for about 2 months straight during her 11th and 12th months of life.
  3. Secured lunch money for our youngest daughter last year, when she was a Junior in high school.

Yep less than 5. You have possibly done more, but I couldn’t think of anything that didn’t also make you look good to others. I could however think of lots of times you screwed our kids over.

  1. Sold the weight bench your son wanted, for $20 bucks.
  2. Didn’t show up when you promised to visit the kids, too many times to count.
  3. Told your friends you needed money to buy things for your kids when really you needed money for yourself.
  4. Promised to bring money to one of your children and show up weeks late or never.
  5. Making out with your girlfriend at your daughter’s birthday party instead of hanging out with your daughter.
  6. Going to your other girlfriend’s house in another state when your son came home for Christmas from Basic Training.
  7. Arriving late and high to your oldest daughter’s high school graduation and then skipping pictures after she asked you to take pictures with her.
  8. Not showing up at all to your oldest daughter’s graduation party.
  9. Not listening to your kids when they tell you something that is going on with your girlfriend and her kids.
  10. Driving like a crazy person because you are mad you said you would give your child a ride across town.

That of course is the short list 🙂

I would like to remind you that your 3 oldest children are 21, 19 and 17. These 3 are old enough to make their own decisions and are not at all intimidated by your loud voice or threats. You feel the only time they talk to you is when they want money. Perhaps if you looked at how you interact with them when you are together you would see that they just don’t like to be ignored or to hang out with your “other” family.

This past weekend you killed your relationship with your son. I understand you wanted your children at your wedding, but I hope you understand that they did not really want to be there. Your wife is not nice to them. She has double standards for her kids and your kids. Your children tried to talk to you about it, but you were unwilling to listen. They were not comfortable making the drive to your wedding location and the fact that they had to come back after dark was not very appealing to them either. The other kicker for them was the girls thought they were in the wedding, but somehow they got kicked out. Then two days later, after you came back to town, you couldn’t even find the time to see your younger daughter off on her trip. You sure are a classy guy.

Yes I am angry. I am tired of seeing my children hurt by your actions. I am tired of hearing how you promised them this or that and didn’t follow through. I am tired of seeing the pain on their faces when you don’t follow through or when you choose not to listen to them. You have produced 6 children that I am aware of, the 3 oldest you co-created with me. The other son is 15 or 16 (the one you never see), you have a 13 year old daughter (the one you signed away your parental rights for) and then there is the youngest daughter who is under 10, this is the only one you have actually made a go of the parenting thing with. I mean the one you pay child support for and take for full weekends during the school year and weeks during the summer. I am glad at this point you have figured at least that part out, for just this one kid. No worries for the other 5, I am sure they will continue to survive. I know my 3 would like you to stop ignoring them when they try to talk to you and listen to the words that come out of their mouths.

Thank you for also telling our son just how horrible my parents were. My parents that have both passed away in the past 7 years at very young ages. The same parents that allowed us to move in with them when we had no where else to go. I believe the year my mom passed away she gave you lots and lots of money to help you get caught up on some of your bills. These same people who supported me for months on end so I could help you pay of two different trucks on two different occasions. Yes my parents were awful because they supported us financially while you gambled and drank all of our money away. They did voice their opinions on your lifestyle but they still supported us. How many times did they take the kids when they were smaller because you just couldn’t handle it?? PLEASE tell me what did your family do to support us, how much contact does your mother have with these kids now? Does she even remember our youngest daughter’s name? Probably not.

7 months to go and I promise I will get to deal with you even less than I do now. I am looking forward to that more than you can possible understand. Good luck and best wishes 🙂



One thought on “Dear Father to my Children,

  1. Monique says:

    Ugh…I married and divorced young. Was so blessed to have great relationship with my boys Dad. WE always put them first. Sorry for all you have been through. Hang in there.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s